The holidays are a wonderful time of year for so many reasons - traditions, family, rest, all the things that so many of us look forward to this time of year. For families living with Alzheimer’s disease and related dementias (ADRD), this joyful time of year can bring extra challenges, concerns, and changes. As we plan for the holidays, let’s look at some tips to help support those living with ADRD and their caregivers.
- Maintain a routine. Keep mealtimes consistent around the same time each day. Have a routine for waking up and going to bed. At any stage of a family’s journey with ADRD, changes in routine, noise levels, and crowds can lead to increased agitation and confusion.
- Keep the gathering small and short. Choose times when the person living with dementia is most likely to have energy and cognition tends to be highest.
- Try to host at the person with dementia’s home. It may be helpful to label bathrooms or the person’s bedroom to make them more easily accessible.
- Involve the person in activities they enjoy (baking, wrapping, singing.)
- Designate a “quiet room” where that person can go if they are overwhelmed. It may be easier to visit with guests there.
- Prepare guests – guide them not to interrupt, correct, test the person’s memory, or overwhelm with questions. Give communication tips: speak slowly, give a few extra seconds for responses, make eye contact with the person when speaking.
- Keep place settings and decorations simple. Make sure walkways are clear and that there aren’t potential hazards like candles or hot drinks.
- Seat the person at the end of the table to avoid being surrounded by multiple conversations. You may also consider headphones or ear buds to help with quiet noise or music your loved one enjoys.
- If appropriate, ask the person with dementia for their input on how they would like to participate. Give 2 options (songs, decorations, sides) and let them choose. We want the person engaged without being overwhelmed.
- Consider using name tags or ask guests to introduce themselves when speaking to the person with dementia.
Caregivers, please ask for help. You are the expert on what you need. Is there a way to delegate cooking duties this year? Can someone come for a few hours so that you can get your shopping done? Take care of yourself and allow others to help.
As families progress on their ADRD journeys, holidays may look different, but there are so many opportunities to find joy. While those opportunities won’t necessarily look the same, they are no less meaningful. The goal for our loved ones is dignity, comfort, and togetherness, not perfection.
Be kind to yourself and enjoy the moments of this holiday season.